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I wish people could read my blog so I won’t need to talk to them personally.

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I heard you. I don’t have a hearing problem or something. I’m just not sure if you wanted me to hear you so I acted like… that

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I hate it when I sleep thinking about something and I wake up and it’s still stuck in my mind. It just keeps bugging my mind.

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Here I am again, yearning for someone’s love and acceptance. Sometimes, it feels more like need than a want. Cause I think, only other people can make me happy.

I can’t make myself happy/

I feel so incomplete

I normally blog about things I hate, people I don’t like and all the other stuff that bothers me here. But this time around, I wanna post the other side of me.

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To my anon,

Yep, I understand. Idk… Hindi ko din alam ano nangyari. Madali lang siguro talaga ako mahawa sa gamit na words ng mga tao. 

I mean, if namura kita or something, I’m sorry… I guess, if naoffend ka. (Tho I’m pretty sure wala akong naganun, more of an expression lang siya…)

But please hayaan niyo na lang, medyo matagal ko din hini-hate sarili ko dahil diyan……

:(

I am scared and excited. I don’t know what I’m feeling.. all I know is that this is all new to me. Oh good lord, please let this end in a nice way where I would be happy, for once, please.

Since I started my first year in college, I’ve become inactive here in my blog. Mostly because I’m afraid people will judge me by the changes that occurred to me, and also because often, I find my thoughts scattered and I just can’t compile and put them all down in a blog post.

A lot of things happened to me for the past 10 months, I can say that I’ve had some of the most memorable days of my life and some of the most horrible days of my life during this period. I’ve become my strongest, I’ve become my weakest.

Maybe I’ve been lost.. but they say, if you’re lost it means you know where you should be it just so happened that you’re not there. In my case, I didn’t where I am, I didn’t know where I should be and the most awful part is I didn’t know where I want to be.

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“Listen to you,” he said. “You said ‘by the Angel.’ Like a Shadowhunter.” He kissed the side of her mouth. ” I love you. God, I love you. I waited so long to say it.” (Clockwork Princess)

“Of course you can have a true Shadowhunter name,” Will said. “You can have mine.” (Clockwork Princess)

Imagine hearing this from your Shadowhunter boyfriend oh my god I can’t sdkaugciusdckjsadbckjsadckasjb 

Give me mine